Category: Fiction

Pieces of fiction.

The Tinning of Dorian Gray, Part 5 (of 5)

The Tinning of Dorian Grey, by Janet Brusselbach
The Tinning of Dorian Gray, by Janet Brusselbach

This is a screenplay I wrote in 2002.  I thought I’d share it with y’all over this holiday week, mainly so I don’t have to do any real, actual new content or anything.  So, check it out, and I hope you enjoy this story about, living, loving, learning and tinning. Continue reading

The Tinning of Dorian Gray, Part 4 (of 5)

The Tinning of Dorian Grey, by Janet Brusselbach
The Tinning of Dorian Gray, by Janet Brusselbach

This is a screenplay I wrote in 2002.  I thought I’d share it with y’all over this holiday week, mainly so I don’t have to do any real, actual new content or anything.  So, check it out, and I hope you enjoy this story about, living, loving, learning and tinning. Continue reading

The Tinning of Dorian Gray, Part 3 (of 5)

The Tinning of Dorian Grey, by Janet Brusselbach
The Tinning of Dorian Gray, by Janet Brusselbach

This is a screenplay I wrote in 2002.  I thought I’d share it with y’all over this holiday week, mainly so I don’t have to do any real, actual new content or anything.  So, check it out, and I hope you enjoy this story about, living, loving, learning and tinning. Continue reading

The Tinning of Dorian Gray, Part 2 (of 5)

The Tinning of Dorian Grey, by Janet Brusselbach
The Tinning of Dorian Gray, by Janet Brusselbach

This is a screenplay I wrote in 2002.  I thought I’d share it with y’all over this holiday week, mainly so I don’t have to do any real, actual new content or anything.  So, check it out, and I hope you enjoy this story about, living, loving, learning and tinning.

Continue reading

The Tinning of Dorian Gray, Part 1 (of 5)

The Tinning of Dorian Grey, by <a href="http://bruesselbach.com">Janet Brusselbach</a>
The Tinning of Dorian Gray, by Janet Brusselbach

This is a screenplay I wrote in 2002.  I thought I’d share it with y’all over this holiday week, mainly so I don’t have to do any real, actual new content or anything.  So, check it out, and I hope you enjoy this story about, living, loving, learning and tinning.

Continue reading

Sue

Fluffies Playing Poker by Janet Brusselbach
Fluffies Playing Poker by Janet Brusselbach

You’ve never had a fluffy pony before, but, honestly, when you saw her in the pound, you figured you had to rescue her. She looked so sad there without any legs.

…Well, actually, she herself looked pretty happy, babbling quietly to herself. Just the sight of a limbless fluffy did you in, though. Apparently some people did this to them so they couldn’t hurt themselves. But, really, what kind of life is that? Sure, they can’t do anything bad… but they can’t do anything at all, period. They just sit there on the floor, in a bowl, on a table, in the litterbox, wherever you put them down. It’s pathetic. You can’t give her her legs back, but you can at least do your best to make her life decent. You’ve always said that you couldn’t just buy a pet — you’d always have to go to the shelter and save a life. And it looks like this is the life you’re gonna save. The card by her cage says her name is “Sue”. Continue reading

A Stupid Dream: Smelly Tongues

Money Queen
This picture has nothing to do with anything, but I like it.  SAD QUEEN HAPPY QUEEN! (Photo credit: @Doug88888)

I had a dream last night — it wasn’t a terribly good dream, but I’m going to share it anyway!  Because I thought it was at least marginally interesting and in defiance of that old saw that there is nothing less interesting than someone else’s dreams.

Continue reading

A Note on Fluffsplosion

Fluffies Playing Poker by Janet Brusselbach
Fluffies Playing Poker by Janet Brusselbach

I realized that the previous Fluffy Pony report involved a phenomenon known colloquially as “fluffsplosion” that not everyone may be aware of.  I will attempt to clear up any confusion or misconceptions in this brief appendix. Continue reading

The Saga of Bluey and Smarty, Part II

Art by BDB/Black Dragon Blood
Art by BDB/Black Dragon Blood

You’re the smarty friend of your herd. Your herd is only two, you, a unicorn, and Bluey, a pegasus. Well, kind of two. Perhaps it would be better to say two halves. One body. Though you’re the smarty, you’re also the end that poops.

Bluey’s first words were “Wuv daddeh!”

Your first words were “Wan’ BLURRRRGGGGGH die.”

Your second words were “wife nu pretty”.

Hooman munstas have no desire to actually kill you. The abusers end up scaring Bluey so bad he makes sorry poopies. They watch and figure that your existence alone is crueler than anything they could ever do to you. The ones who typically take care of and love fluffies can’t bring themselves to kill a healthy fluffy. You are, technically healthy. Bluey’s thriving, and thus you are too. But they can’t bear to see your misery, so they don’t take you in either, so you became a feral herd – the two of you. Luckily, Bluey’s happy to let you be the smarty.  He doesn’t seem to realize that all of your smarty ideas involve attempting suicide. Continue reading

The Fluffy Virus

English: My LCD clock with LED backlight. My o...Every so often you realize that you’re more or less living in the future, and that the future is pretty neat. In fact, most times it’s pretty great, except for two things:

a) In the future, everything is – for whatever reason – online
and
b) Some people are still assholes.

In fact, A wouldn’t even be a problem if it weren’t for B. But B has been a problem for all of history, and will likely continue to remain a problem until humanity dies out… probably due to some people being assholes.  Continue reading