A little while ago, I got a prescription for Ambien (more specifically, generic Ambien) to help me sleep. For those not familiar with the drug, it seemingly helps you fall asleep by putting you into a dream-state while you’re still awake. So if you don’t lie down in bed after taking it, and instead remain seated in front of the computer, you will start hallucinating. Which is awesome, but I’ve also found that it can defeat the purpose, because I end up wanting to stay awake, watching words swirl around. Anyway, on one of the days after I had first started taking it, I was looking through the Word doc where I keep track of all the movies I watch, and discovered that I had written a few reviews during one of these states of half-dreaming. This is the first of them, and it’s not my favorite, but I kinda like some of the lines where I’m trying to be clever. As far as relaying a synopsis and my general opinion, it’s pretty much the same as my regular reviews, but it’s with a way goofier sense of humor and a fucking shitload of spelling errors. The line about subtitles at the end was supposed to be sarcastic, by the way, because I turn the subtitles on for every single movie I watch, especially movies in English. Fucking try it before getting so incredulous, it’s totally great.
After suffering through the WHITE RIBbin, I watched the RED RIDin. It was about some killers, one person who killed kids in the first and third movie, ad one fella who killed prozzies in the second and he was called a Ripper. I thought theses mpveis would be more about criminial investigations into serial killers, or a serial killer, like Zodiac was, but it turned out to be more about police corruption. IN ALL THREE. Evrey movie started a=t all good, with a good cop wanting to catch someone, but the story turned into the good cop getting shit on by bad cops because corruption was fucked up in the police force! Thets’a Interesting I GUESS, but just wasn’t what I wanted out of these movies. I also couldn’t understand al ot of the heavily accented dialogue, and would have preferred to wait for a dvd with subtitles. I pretty mychg got the gist, but it would’ve been tons times better had I understodd sometimes better. Between two of the movies, someone was talking about them up front, and mentioned the idea of releasing a movie like this subtitled, and this woman in the audience shouted out “UGGGggghhhHHH. SUBTITLES ARE so annoying.” It’s true, though. What kind of service to they really provide, really? Anyway, all three Red Riding movies were equally pretty good, and if they look great to you, then I reccomennd Zodiac.
To read more of Austin’s writings, almost always about movies, visit his website at www.placentaovaries.net.